Haven’t blogged since…. 3 years ago, back in grade 9. Maybe because I had a reason to back then, with all the issues surrounding me. As of now, I guess this can be my way of venting out, since keeping everything to yourself is not healthy at all! Heck, I’d love to see a shrink one day.
Life up to now isn’t so bad. No girl to go emo over, marks… fuck marks; bleh. If anything, family relation issue is the only thing that’s been bugging me lately. But I’ve given up on that. I’m not going to have one after I graduate anyways, so why bother, right? Wrong. I’m just hopeless. I don’t even care anymore… or try to, at least. efg.
Chem test + History quiz tomorrow. Doesn’t seem that loaded or anything. Shouldn’t be too bad. Feeling a tad confident…. for once. hah.
So not so long ago, I’ve been having some friendship issues. Funny part is, its only one sided; Its all in my head. Close friend of mine. I really like him. Sometimes, it just doesn’t feel that way. I mean, no mutual treatment, its like I’m just another friend to him. We barely talk to begin with (surprisingly) and things just feel like its drifting apart sometimes. The paranoid overreacting sensitive person I am, I took big offense to this. You see, of all the things I have in my life, the most important of them all, are my friends. and for me to feel this way from someone like him, it sure felt like shit.
I had a talk about this with a friend, and realized he’s just not the type of person who would act so openly like I would, like I would expect from him. Maybe I was just expecting way too much from him. Just maybe. maybe. So after that night, I decided to just take everything. Accept things as they are, and don’t expect so much from others. It doesn’t change the circumstances, and yeah it still bugs me, no. She told me to talk to him one day. I planned to, that very night, when he came on MSN. But fuck, he has some weird affect, talking to me cheerfully and innocently. Fuck that. Decided to leave that for some other time. If I ever happened to feel this way again.
…. Yes I get paranoid time to time. Plus, my grammar is pretty horrible, I’d be surprised if you understood all that. ^^
Time to study on with Chemistry…. must attain 90% or over!
Mood: content.
